When you think about being sexy and being a mom, do you consider yourself sexy despite motherhood? Do you ever tell yourself you shouldn’t wear that outfit because you’re a mother? Do you shy away from drawing attention to yourself because of the “mom” title? Well, I am here to tell you that you are not required to give up your confidence and feeling sexy after having children.

All moms have inherent sex appeal. All moms. The moms wearing yoga pants, the moms in their high heels and lipstick, the moms at home in t-shirts stained with baby spit up, the moms who have found comfort in their “mom jeans”, and the moms who rock a messy bun, no shower for 3 days, and have learned to live without sleep, yep, they got that sex appeal!

So, in no particular order, here are some tips to help you boost or maintain your confidence and sexiness:

Make time to do things for you. Practice some self-love. Don’t feel guilty over a little “me” time. As moms, we are constantly engulfed in motherly responsibilities and selfless acts. You’re constantly meeting everyone else’s needs but don’t forget about your own. We need time to regroup, take a few deep breaths, and do things that make us happy. We’ve gotta maintain our sanity in one way or another, right? Even if it’s a quick run through Starbuck’s drive-through to get an iced latte with almond milk, that’s a treat to myself and I savor every sip. Why? Because at home, I’m either drinking a boatload of water, coupled with carrot juice, kombucha, and mother’s milk herbal tea. So, coffee and sugar every blue moon is an extra special treat, just for me! Or, I may stay up a little late at night because the house is quiet and I can let my hair down and enjoy a nice snack all to myself, in peace, and with my Girls (Golden Girls).

Exercise your mind. Don’t kick curiosity and knowledge to the curb. Moms need sharp minds to stay one step ahead of our children. After all, these millennials will make you think they’ve been here before in a previous life. Am I lying? Anyway, don’t be afraid to challenge yourself mentally. Read a good book, take a class, attend a workshop or forum, listen to the latest world news. Who knows, you may tap into something and uncover a side of you that you didn’t realize existed; a very interesting side. This side may help you hold more stimulating conversations and others will also find you more interesting. You’ll feel confident in conversing with just about anybody and topic.

Take care of your body. No, I don’t mean diet and look like you’re ready to grace the cover of Sports Illustrated. I mean, simply make good choices to increase a healthy lifestyle. Maybe try meatless Monday or opt for grilled instead of fried. Try adding more fruits and veggies throughout the day and drink more water. If you have a hard time finding time to exercise, maybe you can do it in 10 minute spurts, walk with a friend, or burn off some energy playing or running around with your children.

Meatless Monday: Sweet potato fries and plant-based chili with beans and veggies.

Stand your ground. Especially in your household. Children – sooner or later – will try to push back on your authority and will try you to see what they can get away with or simply to try and get their way. Be strong! They have to learn where you stand on certain issues. Got an ex? Yeah, stand your ground and always be firm with what’s right for the children.

Single moms are sexy. Period. Our single mom qualities of a full heart (compliments of our beloved kiddos), life experience, and leadership are characteristics of a strong woman that cannot be overlooked. Own it!

You are a strong, empowered, woman, on a mission to raise her children, be successful, and create your own happiness. You’re someone’s mommy, for crying out loud. If that ain’t sexy I don’t know what is!