As a child, I used to wonder what it would be like to be a teenager, to wear a bra, to grow up, get married, have children, and the list goes on. So far, I haven’t experienced all of my childhood fantasies but I’ve come pretty close, with some regrets and a lot of gratitude along the way. But alas, here I am in my 30’s; the age of wonder and consternation. With that, I’d like to share a few things I’ve gleaned along the way in my journey of 30s:

  1. You find yourself emulating those things your mother said and did to you as a child that made you cringe 🤷🏾‍♀️
  2. There is a season for everything. A season for relationships, a season for friends (yes, they too, come and go and it’s ok), a season for trials and testing of faith/endurance…these seasons are a part of your purpose. They can break you or they can be stepping stones to your path to victory.
  3. While it’s great to plan and be meticulous about certain things, it’s also important to add spontaneity in your life. If you never just do things on a whim like take a mini road trip, take part in some fun activity, or say yes to something you’d otherwise say no to, you may find yourself missing out on blissful experiences that add meaning, value, and joy to your life!
  4. Trying to go back to the future and think about the “what ifs” is a waste of time. Let it go. Your time is now – right here, right now! Make the most of all of your blessings and the meaningful relationships you have with loved ones, right now, while you have the time.
  5. Be grateful for the rough patches and the blessings.
  6. It may not seem like it at the moment, but all things work out for our good. God is more than able to take the broken fragments of our life, piece them together and create something beautiful. Romans 8:28
  7. Always stand up for what you believe in and do it with conviction.
  8. Say what you mean and mean what you say. Express yourself. Don’t be intimidated and backpedal if you meant what you said the first time. If you need to voice your emotions, convey and articulate them without guilt. You deserve to be heard.
  9. Success and failure are synonymous with life. They both happen. Accept them both, learn how to be even better, and rock it out!
  10. Never compare your life to someone else’s. You’ll never be satisfied if you do, plus you’re only an outsider looking in. Everyone’s life is not always at it appears.
  11. Travel is good for the soul.
  12. Don’t waste your time with messy people. Avoid them altogether.
  13. You can’t change anyone who doesn’t want to change. Ahem! Ladies, remember that when you notice those red flags in a dating relationship.
  14. A picture is truly worth a thousand words. Take lots!
  15. Live in the moment and be mindful of the here and now. You only live once.
  16. Social media scrolling, email checking, and anything else that detracts from giving someone your undivided attention is not worth it. It can wait.
  17. Learn to say no without the guilt.
  18. Don’t be in such a hurry or in a zone that you can’t smile or say hello to a stranger. Who knows…your kind gesture could have brought them down off of the ledge.
  19. Put on those heels. Wear the lipstick. It’s ok to get dressed and look good for you! Ok, maybe you don’t really rock with heels. Cool, rock the heck out of those flats!!!
  20. You can live vicariously through the life of a 20-year-old but your body can’t. Learn to accept the changes in your body with age. Embrace them. Women are warriors. We birth children, for crying out loud!
  21. You can have money and still not have peace.
  22. Don’t beat yourself up. Every day is a new day and a new opportunity.
  23. It truly is better to give than to receive so give of your time, your efforts, and if need be, your finances, when you can. Give back to your community. If you see a need, even in your own home, or family members’, do it. Like if you go over to your parent’s house and you go to the kitchen to throw something in the trash and see the can is full, just go on and take the trash out for them. I promise you’ll feel good about it and you’ll put a smile on their face.
  24. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT tell all of your business. Word travels fast and these days it’s hard to trust even those you think are really your friends.
  25. Doing something that makes you happy is not selfish and does not take away from the love you have for your children.
  26. If it’s not in the house, you can’t eat it.
  27. Keep track of your money and don’t just spend it because you have it.
  28. What’s meant to be, will be. Whether is one month from now, one year from now, or ten years from now. If it’s meant to be it will be.
  29. Positivity goes a long way…so does a miserable, negative attitude.
  30. Always be willing to learn, even when you don’t feel like being receptive to it because you’re really being schooled for something you didn’t know.

We’ve been gifted a sacred blessing called life. We should honor that and strive to live with intentional purpose. Let’s be good stewards of what we have, the relationships we’re in, our gifts, our blessings, and our capacity to love, learn, and grow. Life is short.